My pitch - online storage service

Do you have a laptop? Do you have confidential and sensitive data on your laptop? Ever worried about losing your laptop and compromise your business?
Do you work at office and at home? Do you find it difficult to keep data in sync on multiple computers?
Have you tried XDrive and found it slow and unreliable?
(Service name placeholder) is a private, secure, fast, and reliable online storage service. Similar to XDrive, it appears as a storage drive on your desktop so you can access it from any software. Unlike XDrive, it is secure, fast, and reliable. Nobody has access to your data except yourself.
(Service name placeholder) will be available from July 2008.
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What do you guys think about this pitch?johnqh2008-3-27 23:26:1
Do you work at office and at home? Do you find it difficult to keep data in sync on multiple computers?
Have you tried XDrive and found it slow and unreliable?
(Service name placeholder) is a private, secure, fast, and reliable online storage service. Similar to XDrive, it appears as a storage drive on your desktop so you can access it from any software. Unlike XDrive, it is secure, fast, and reliable. Nobody has access to your data except yourself.
(Service name placeholder) will be available from July 2008.
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What do you guys think about this pitch?johnqh2008-3-27 23:26:1
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Comments
It`s just not a feasible business model anymore.
Thank you for the suggestion.
I address XDrive specifically because XDrive has lost 2/3 of their visitor count since AOL aquired XDrive due to reliability problems (a simple google search on "XDrive problems" will show you that), and I want to target those people. Others who has not tried XDrive may not even know why desktop integration with drive letter makes a big difference....
And no, I am not looking for investors, so yes, this is a marketing pitch for customers.
st8ic, you may think all online storages are the same, but please try XDrive and see if you would see a difference.
You are absolutely right.
I may mention XDrive for the purpose of bringing traffic from google when people search for alternative for XDrive, but it should be a seperate page.
So, let me try a different approach - again, it is still a sales pitch (even if I am looking for investors, the investor pitch won`t work if I cannot even get the sales pitch to work).
Carrying your laptop everywhere? Work in the office and home? Worried about keeping your documents in sync and keep your confidential data safe?
We provide a encrypted removable hard drive for your computer, except it residents on the internet. You can use it like a real hard drive - copy to and from it, open files directly in Office, edit, and save back to the drive. No more multiple copies on different computers, no more manual syncing, and no more awkward and slow web interface for uploading and downloading files.
It is a private storage. Only you can access it. Even if you lose your laptop, your data is still safe.
It only costs $10/month for 10GB of storage. Your data is worth more than that.